me: what’s for dinner?
her: *spreads her legs*
so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it.
"yeah, everything’s fine, i just tucked your kid into bed. but can i cover up the clown statue in the corner? it’s freaking me out"
"what? we dont have a kid. take our clown statue and get out of the house right now"
can someone just delete weheartit